die Masse der Oesterreichischen Gesellschaft
Posted on March 27, 2008 at 11:15 pm by Galina
(Photo: unrecognized suicide attempt at U3 underground line at 12.15, man with long blond hair jumped down at railways, but changed his mind to die and started to cry; when being pulled back at platform by two passengers, he imitated being sick, dizzy and that he fell down by chance)
Life can be hard, but it gives miraculous presents sometimes.
Once during my extreme conditions survival in Graz I wrote petition to Bundesministerium f�r Arbeit without particular hope to get reply, as many of my appeals stayed unanswered before
However, some months later thick letter with blue stamp of ministry arrived, and using it as flag during my next visit to immigration bureau, I unexpectedly reached wonderful results: that very middle-aged lady in Landesregierung, who for a few years aroused deep fear in my soul, unwillingly issued normal time-long visa with access to work market for me.
I literally trembled as a leaf when was to see her before. She demonstrated signs of satisfaction with her unnatural powers over pleading emigrants and always made me to believe there was no escape.
Probably local regulation system she represented wanted to avoid possible complications with upper system representatives. Bureaucratic machine cracked and big wheel of destiny moved forward in my favor.
My euphoric moods brought me immediately to Graz AMS (Job office)
I slept little at night wandering in imaginary gardens of joy. Life suddenly started to look harmonious and purposeful.
It was rather warm spring day, and sticky reception hall occurred to be full of people.
They smelled as untidy cloths, alcohol steams and mood disorder. The turn was going on slowly, and current number on the screen that I could not clearly see and was afraid to miss made me nervous.
At last, I found myself in front of clerk, who was completely absorbed with papers. I passed him my new lovingly looking identification card with pink Austrian eagle and expected manifestation of new miracles.
During process of interrogation clerk never glanced at me, as if trying to spare himself from sight of next bore, only when I retorted I wanted to find any work connected with photography, he lifted his translucent green eyes at me, being obviously amused.
During my next visits, I reached upper floors of building, and discovered that long white corridors of AMS with dark blue quadrates of doors and metallic luminosity of ventilation tubes made me feeling uneasy.
The bag hooks in public WC cabins were removed giving idea that personal of office could well predict reaction of some unemployed to news they could get here.
There were a few computers and internet at the ground floor, and studying faces of people around me, who preferred to look at bare walls instead, I concluded they hardly connected reduction of their life opportunities with their own lack of literacy and initiation, believing that being jobless was only evil fate.
Sensing emanations of hopelessness they produced I recollected words of well-known motivation author Wayne Dyer who was born to poor family but became rich, that poverty is first of all beliefs system.
I could add to the wisdom of motivation father that it was easier to change the form of your own nose sometimes than patterns of your habitual thinking.
